Jeremy and I went for a walk yesterday. It was a gorgeous summer day (we got good weather just in time for fall) and it was nice just to get out and spend some time together. I got an amazing shot of them in the woods, but it’s a full face shot so I can’t share it here; they truly looked lovely though. Meanwhile we simply chattered about nothing in particular.
We were walking back towards home when I looked over at Jeremy and remembered something they’d said this winter.
“Mom, I’ve thought about killing myself this month. My life’s pointless, it’s just not going to get any better. I’m never going to amount to anything.”
“Jeremy,” I said hesitantly. “You know I go on a parenting group for mothers. There’s a few people in that group who don’t identify with either gender. One thing to remember though is they’ve grown up, are in relationships, and have kids.”
“Are there any fathers in that group?”
I shook my head. “There’s another group for fathers though.”
“What do they wear?”
“Whatever they want to wear,” I replied. “Some wear masculine clothes, some wear feminine, some alternate between, and some try for more neutral clothes. It just depends on what they feel more comfortable in.” They smiled.
We walked a bit further. “Do any of them live nearby,” they asked hopefully.
“Umm, I know someone who lives across the lake but that’s not exactly convenient. Why?”
“I was hoping maybe they could come in and talk to my teacher… but it wouldn’t make a difference. When that kid came out as trans in the other class…”
I looked over to see Jeremy scowl. “Our teacher sat us down to explain that the kid was male and not female and one of my classmates started to cry because he had to stay a girl and wasn’t allowed to change. She cried so much the teacher ended up sending her into the hall to calm down. She didn’t try to explain anything to [classmate] at all. She should have told her it didn’t have anything to do with her. If it was me, I’d have sent her home for a week.”
“That’s not fair either,” I interrupted. “She’s developmentally delayed. She should have gotten an explanation instead of being sent into the hall.”
“That’s why I said a week,” Jeremy protested. “I’d go look up information.”
“You wouldn’t need a week. The teacher should have already had the information ready ahead of time.” They nodded.
“I’m going to do a teach,” they said decisively. “I’ll explain everything and they’ll have to listen, no excuses.”
So Jeremy’s going to teach a group of teens in a life skills class about non-binary trans… under the supervision of their teacher, who’s been critiquing Jeremy’s hair and nails for the past two years. This is going to be one heck of an interesting fall.
And now I’m off to dye their hair purple and watch an episode of Doctor Who. School goes back in tomorrow.