We braved the Pride Parade…

I had two anxiety attacks this week, one at work and one right in the middle of our doctor’s office. I came really close to passing out there although, to be fair, if I’m going to pass out his office is probably the best place. Jeremy was so sweet, hugging me on the bus and in the waiting room then sharing zir game maps in an attempt to distract me. The doctor has doubled my EffexorXR and has prescribed Ativan for my anxiety attacks, which hopefully will help (so far so good).

Then there’s Jeremy. Zie had one anxiety attack last week at 3am and one night of complete insomnia, which meant zie missed two days of school. And then zie’s been fine. It helps that I’ve signed the papers withdrawing zir from school at the end of the month. Only two more weeks.

Between the two of us, we’re both fairly fragile emotionally and neither of us are fond of crowds at the best of times… but we went to our local Pride Parade anyways.

Last night I painted my nails the colours of the ace pride flag. Well almost, I didn’t have any white nail polish (or more accurately, Emma didn’t have any) but she had a pale silver which I figured would look good. I painted Jeremy’s nails too but zie picked plain beige so I didn’t bother to take a photo.

ace nails

The best photo I could take with my cellphone

We caught the bus this morning and discovered our local Sunday bus changed, or more accurately turned into another bus route part way through our trip, and we ended up doing the milk run. Almost literally considering at one point we were taking pictures of barns and fields. What should have been a not quite 10 minute trip ended up stretching to just over a half hour. We got off downtown and I went onto my phone to check my email. I knew I’d received an email earlier saying where the pre-parade barbecue was being held, I just needed to find the folder it went to.

“Mom, you don’t need to look. The barbecue’s over there.” Jeremy pointed toward a nearby mall right as I finally realized there was music blaring from nearby. I put away my phone and we followed our ears.

The first person I met was a woman from PFLAG who greeted me with a huge smile and a hug. Then we went to get food and I found out they had vegan burgers this year (which turned out to be very popular). We wandered around for a bit, looking at the floats and trying to see if we knew anyone else.

“Can we go to Dollarama or somewhere more quiet?” Jeremy asked. “I’m getting really anxious.”

“Why don’t we go to the bridge,” I suggested and zie nodded.

Shopping isn’t relaxing for me, meanwhile the bridge was a quiet footbridge over the nearby creek. It’s a great place to take photos, which relaxes both of us.

Jeremy not only took photos with zir camera but also dropped a webcam down to take closeups of the creek.

Jeremy not only took photos with zir camera but also dropped a webcam down to take closeups of the creek.

I also managed to take a great shot of the two of us, which Jeremy agreed could be shared here. Which is nice because zie looks so cute in the photo (I love how amazingly blue zir eyes are)…

Jeremy and I

And then we went to wait for the parade to start…

Talk about relaxed!

Talk about relaxed!

The parade was small, but bigger than the one we attended two years ago, and quite colourful…

balloon rainbow

rainbow whirligig2

parade1

parade2

bracelets

parade3

parade4

I'm pretty sure I've lost these socks to Jeremy.

I’m pretty sure I’ve lost these socks to Jeremy.

It was a good afternoon but Jeremy found it quite overwhelming and wanted to head home before the post-parade party even began. Which is good to know. I’d tentatively thought about going to Toronto’s parade this year but think we’ll pass and give Jeremy another year to work on zir anxiety before braving even bigger crowds. The plus side is, for the first time in ages Jeremy’s looking forward to school tomorrow. It’s the last day of zir work placement and zie’s excited about telling everyone it’s zir birthday on Friday.

Happy Pride everyone!!!

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11 thoughts on “We braved the Pride Parade…

  1. I get incredibly anxious in crowds myself so I can understand how it stressful it could be for you both. Your pictures are great! And that’s a really nice picture of you and Jeremy. 🙂

  2. I have never been good in crowds either but have managed to overcome my fear over the years to attend concerts and even festivals… still you’ll usually find me somewhere near the back/edge of the crowd rather than in the thick of it.The photo of the two of you is lovely, zir eyes really are an amazing blue 🙂

  3. Beautiful pictures. Both of you look amazing. I um just realized I think I didn’t answer yr last email. Oops. My email is a total disaster. If I don’t answer right away emails that I want to answer often get lost/forgotten. It is a real problem. Sorry.
    I get anxious with crowds and also with tall buildings. For me I think there is some benefit in going in spite of the anxiety. Do you find that? I’m hoping you’ll get to see someone from the parade again, gaining in sense of community…… When I go to “the big city” pride parade it takes a lot out of me emotionally and it is also a huge positive. Walking in the parade is BOTH highly anxiety provoking AND a huge positive love fest. Which is a bit weird.

    • It’s definitely overwhelming but I like going. I think it would be too much for Jeremy to handle this year but am hoping zie’ll be able to go the following year. Thanks 🙂

      I’m awful at checking my email and remember every couple of weeks or so.

      • I was reading this again, and I was thinking how the parade was small. I’ve figured out that you live near Toronto (I don’t mean this was secret, I just mean um like I remember it now). So then I had this big new thought that there must be a separate pride parade for some town or suburb where you live. (I’m sure Toronto’s parade is bigger than this!) So just when I got all this figured out, I got to the part where you talk about considering whether to go to the Toronto pride parade.

        All of this is more interesting that usual because I am likely to be in Toronto for a week at the end of September. I even looked at maps and stuff.

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