Bobbing in the weight loss pool…

I went to pull on a short sleeved shirt today, one I’d worn in the Dominican Republic this March, and it didn’t fit. Like not even a tiny bit. The good news is I’ve only put on five pounds since then. The bad news is the effort at taking the weight off. Dieting while taking an antidepressant is akin to diving while wearing water wings. Once the pressure eases off, you’re bobbing to your original weight again. And I’m currently on three.

I have another issue, one I really don’t know how to solve. I regularly have days where I just don’t care about me or my weight. Feeling a bit peckish? How about a sleeve of Oreos? Really liked that ice cream bar? Have two. You know you want them. Deep down inside I know this is a really bad idea but the rest of me just. doesn’t. care. Right now I’ve limited the number of treats I have in the apartment to just one, salted caramel balls. The only problem is I can see the grocery store from my window, it’s no problem at all to nip over and buy something yummy and high calorie. How do I convince myself to eat healthy when I don’t care at all?

Meanwhile I’m still slogging along trying to get my 10 thousand steps in each day. I get it on most days, today I’m at 13,424 steps. I need to start using the treadmill regularly as well. I find my stride lengthens after using it regularly and I walk faster too.

The last thing I’m going to do is only go on the scale once a month. My weight bobs up and down (and up and down) which doesn’t help my mood. Hopefully ignoring the scale until the first Sunday of the month will help my “I just don’t care” days. Something’s got to.

Some of these things will resolve themselves eventually. It appears to be about a 20 minute walk from my new place to the nearest grocery store, making a spontaneous trip for ice cream not so appealing. Plus I’m signing up for a gym membership and hopefully will learn what some of the other machines are for and how to work them. And I’ll find cooking easier too. Colin rearranged the kitchen yesterday and I no longer have a counter (this isn’t unusual). It’s so much easier to chop veggies and knead dough with counter space. But for now, I’ll simply do my best and that will have to be good enough.

tomorrow is a new day

9 thoughts on “Bobbing in the weight loss pool…

  1. I have this problem too… either I have to force myself to eat as there are days when I really don’t fancy eating at all and others where I can eat a litre of icecream in one go with sauce and sprinkles on it too…. I have found that having a piece of cucumber and a tomato and a pint of water can help cure the cravings for a bit though! And overnight oats for breakfast seems to help too xxx

  2. It is hard to rely entirely on willpower to make healthy decisions. After a stressful day especially, willpower can drained. Then it is harder to not cave in for junk food. I think it’s important to always have reasons for why you want to eat healthy on your mind to help make eating healthier easier.

    With how much weight can fluctuate, that is a great idea to weigh yourself less often. It’s easy to get discouraged when weighing too often.

  3. I understand the struggle and losing weight is the most difficult journey you’ll ever take.

    Losing a few pounds feels awesome, but THEN when I’ve gained all back hopelessness sets in. I’ve been on that road more times than I can count. I hate the feeling.

    All I can say is hang in there and don’t give up.

    Thanks for sharing.


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