It’s time to be normal…

Me and my giant carrotIt seems like it’s something that works for the majority of the population so it’s time for me to step up and join in with normality. The first step is figuring out how.

What do normal people talk about? I’ve got the weather down pat. I mean that’s a necessity. But what about cats? Do they talk about their cats? How about their cats interests? It hardly seems worth it to talk about your cats if you neglect to discuss their likes and dislikes. You’re basically just saying their name. What about your favourite stuffies? Can you mention several stuffies or do you have to stick with just one? I don’t know how I can winnow it down to any less than three. And is Doctor Who a major topic of conversation? Does everyone have a favourite Doctor? I like 10 but I really like 11 and thirteen and nine and blargh! I really like them all! How do I pick one?

People talk so much about coffee and wine. Hopefully being normal doesn’t mean I have to like either of those. I really like hot chocolate (especially with vegan mini marshmallows on top) or slushies, particularly the red ones. It doesn’t matter which red, it’s either going to be strawberry or cherry and both are good. It’s probably not an adult drink. I guess daiquiris are slushies, just without a straw, but with rum… which would ruin the taste. I think I’ll stick with my slushie.

Then there’s clothes. What sort of garlands do people wear in their hair? Apparently none. And sequins? There’s a none there too. There’s got to at least be glittery shoes! And we’ve got another nope. I’m batting right out in the clothing department, very sparkly too I might add.

What do normal people do in their spare time?

*looks around cautiously*

Watching TV? I don’t own one. Hanging out with friends? I’ve got a couple. How do I collect more? Does it involve snares? How about gardening? Except I’m surprised I haven’t killed off my artificial plants yet. Do I spout off Doctor Who facts outside the grocery store until someone perks up and starts a conversation? Umm maybe that one’s not normal. Snail collecting? Someone throw me a clue here?

Maybe if there’s room enough for everyone, there’s room enough for me as myself. Maybe I don’t have to be normal. Maybe the normal people have it under control. Which is good because I don’t think I’d do very well at being normal. I do just fine at being me.

 

2 thoughts on “It’s time to be normal…

    • I haven’t eaten meat in 28 years and I’m not going to start now. Fruits, vegetables, legumes, nuts, and whole grains are good for you and I’m going to keep on eating them.

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