Throwing the pieces of my life
Into the air
Like seeds they fall.
The ground around here
Isn’t the best
But I’ll care for it as I can
And seeds will sprout
Spreading tendrils of hope
Into my heart.
I can almost see the colours in the shadows
Nearly feel the sun through the grey
Where’s the light at the end of my tunnel
The rainbow to brighten my day?
Cast a light for me in the darkness
Give a hand to hold until dawn
A beacon of hope through the shadows
A star to fill me with song.
I have a long distance to travel
A faint, jagged trail to climb
Please walk with me for a while
And help me to mend up my mind.
I sift pieces as fine and ephemeral as memories
I remember that fragment
It tumbles past as a glimpse of a smile
An impression of hope
Each piece disconnected.
The whole shimmers before me
My hand scoops and comes up empty
Trust, once shattered
Cannot be replaced.
~ Sand ~
I built my mind on a bed of sand
It shifts when the wind blows
Scattering grains across my cerebellum.
Was my thought always there?
Or had it been a few steps over?
I can’t remember
The sand gives no sign.
The mirrors bend in their frames
Warping my reflection
Who’s on the other side?
Grains sift through cracks in the wall
Each piece a boulder
Depending on perspective
Who’s to say mine is more relevant than the ant’s?
I gather my thoughts
Organizing, smoothing, straightening
And wait for the sand to settle.
When do I smile?
Is that my mark on the floor?
The lights are too bright
I can’t see the expressions on the faces judging me.
My lines are jumbled
They don’t seem to fit the dialogue
Maybe my script was dropped?
There’s no numbers on the pages.
My voice is too soft
The director can’t hear me
Even the people in the front are complaining.
I’m failing at the audition for my life.