The Potato Bucket…

potato bucketI bought myself a potato bucket. This is not something I thought I’d ever do except I seem to have acquired quite a few potatoes and it’s all because of the vegetable ring I’ve found myself in. And, to be honest, I never thought I’d be in one of those either. Do other people even have vegetable rings? Can I call it nefarious? Is this a normal part of adult life I’ve somehow missed? Either way I’m smack in the middle of one, zucchini in hand.

Now I like veggies, most of them at least. Carrots and potatoes… onions and celery… I even like zucchini and broccoli. But there’s a few I don’t like. Eggplant for example. I know vegans are supposed to love it and it gets stuck on vegan menus quite a bit (when the menu’s being prepared by a non-vegan) but I find it bitter. I don’t like chewy water cucumber either. Enter my friend S. She likes both of those things. So when I get gifted them (which happens surprisingly regularly in the summer), I give them to here. Meanwhile she goes to a food bank about a half hour from here and they don’t let you choose what you’re receiving, they have a bag ready and waiting for you. And she has a lot of foods she won’t eat. One of them happens to be potatoes. So I’ll be given potatoes elsewhere, she’ll have been with me and received potatoes as well then given me hers, and she’s gone a half hour away and got still more potatoes. And they’ve all been shoehorned into the bottom of my fridge.

On top of that my neighbour Cat Dad has a worker who gives him food every other Thursday. Meanwhile he’s a pickier eater than even Colin (that would be really picky). So every other week he comes next door, fusses with my cats, tries to get his cats to come over for a play date (so far they’ve ignored him on that one), and hands me a bag of food. Some goes to S, a bit goes to Colin, and most goes to me. And there are always potatoes. I swear I could serve myself potatoes every day this week and I’d still have some left over and yet I still take more then say to myself, “Well I’ll just make a few more batches of fries”. For who? Half the building?

Now Colin’s thrown himself into the mix. He’s heard me talk about veggie swapping so brought several over for me. His workers bought them for him so he’d eat healthier. Colin has food aversions. The equator will hit absolute zero before he eats a bag of baby carrots and I’m pretty sure earth will be incinerated before then. To celebrate welcoming him into this group of veggie swappers I gave him an entire bag of potatoes. It just seemed like the right thing to do.

More conversations with Jeremy…

Jeremy and I were walking home from the grocery store, each with an over-stuffed buggy, when Jeremy slowed for a moment.

“Mom? Give me one very important piece of information you’ve learned,” zie said. Zie adjusted the 10lb sack of potatoes (on sale for $1.99!) and turned the cart toward home.

“Underwear on before pants,” I replied promptly. Jeremy stopped and stared at me in disbelief. I simply smiled.

“Umm… well… yes… I guess…” Jeremy finally stammered. “I was expecting ‘The Doctor always lies’.”

I probably haven’t got that far in the series.

Zie gave me another look then continued walking. “Mom, you’re weird.”

I snorted. “Seriously kid, you’re only just figuring this out now?”

“And annoying,” zie added.

“I’m not annoying,” I replied. “You’d miss me if I wasn’t here. I grow on you… like foot rot.”

“No, more like that gross mould.” Jeremy looked at my expression and backpedaled. “But some people really like mould,” zie assured me.

Yeah, thanks kid.

I just finished a huge argument with Jeremy, who insisted the giant pot of tomatoes needs to come inside and live in our dining room because it’s going to die outside now that it’s getting colder and the tomato plant is growing so much that it’s obviously trying to live and needs to be saved. Meanwhile I was explaining that tomato plants are annual plants and die every winter. We are not keeping a 4ft wide plant in the dining room, just to watch it die. The tomato plant is outside now.

I also just tagged this with foot rot and mould just to see who wanders in with those search terms.
*waves at the confused people*