Take Back The Night!

She bent down… just like this. It was obvious she was doing it for me. Then she said “I’m not that kind of girl”.

I’d dressed up a bit for this event. Put on make up, wore a sparkly shirt, I even added a rainbow bead necklace a friend just gave me. Listening to the two men talking nearby made me wish I could scrub off my face and put on something a little more ugly… a lot more invisible.

When she breaks up with her boyfriend, I’m totally going for her.

There was no indication that he saw her as a person in her own right. She moved solely for him and, when her boyfriend was done it was going to be his turn to have her.

But let me ask u this then let’s say I ask u to a dance and it’s a dream I really wanted and u tell me no and I go on a killing spree what would you say was the trigger point to my anger.

~ actual question asked to a friend ~

The Take Back the Night event started in an auditorium full of people… young and old… male and female. There were booths around the room where I got candy, a pen, and an apple. A Metis drumming group played at the front. I admired one lady’s sequined hat and then it was time to sit.

#webelieveyou

Story after story, in video and in person, of women who’d been raped, assaulted, molested, and beaten. Story after story where they were disbelieved because he wouldn’t do that. Story after story where women went to the police to be empowered and take back their right to bodily autonomy, only to have the police fail them too.

take-back-the-night

I was photobombed 🙂

My ex had a favourite position, one which made it so I couldn’t speak and couldn’t push him away. I couldn’t change my mind midway because “no” wasn’t an option. I told him this in tears and suggested a hand touch which would mean “no”. He ignored it… twice. That was when I realized the ignoring was deliberate, he liked that I was struggling… that I couldn’t stop him. I refused to get into that position after that and he sulked like a small child being told “no” to seconds of dessert. I’m a person, not a serving of cake.

Whatever we wear
Where ever we go
Yes means yes
And no means no!

We spilled out of the auditorium, a large jubilant, defiant crowd… hemmed in by a strip of yellow caution tape and guarded by police. Pouring onto the road, chanting almost incomprehensible words. Did we want safety or ice cream? The echoes sounded like both.

Two, four, six, eight
No more violence
No more rape!

I walked home after the event with a neighbour. Cheers and laughter erupted ahead of us, followed by a faint “no-oo”. My heart felt like it was slamming against my ribs and I rocked as I walked. What could we do against a crowd? Both our phones were dead and he’s shorter and more slight than me. The soccer field ahead was lit; it soon became apparent a goal had been scored. My relief was instantaneous.

There were children scattered through the walk, blowing whistles and waving hand made signs. For now it’s just fun. How long will it take for the message to sink in? Will they be the change for the future? Are there enough of them?

Michelle? You go out for walks on your own? Do you really think it’s safe?

I used to. Maybe someday I will again.

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Opening with homophobia…

A friend of mine went to the Marc Anthony concert in Miami, Florida last night at the AmericanAirlines Arena. She felt horrified and, in her own words, hopeless when the opening act started. The comedian, Joey Vega, started his act with the statement “no faggots accepted here”. She and her husband both stood up and booed but she said they were the only ones, that people were laughing and clapping.

Now I don’t know what to do and quite frankly am not in a state of mind to do anything right now. But if anyone else wants to do something, here’s all the contact information I could find.

AmericanAirlines Arena
601 Biscayne Blvd, Miami, FL 33132, United States
1-786-777-1000
Contact us

Feedback address for Sony Music (Marc Anthony’s label)

And now my jaw drops. I just found this gem of a quote on the Comedy Hosting website:

Joey [Vega] has combined his comedy with motivational speaking — helping people realize that anything is possible in America. No matter who you are — Latino, Black, white, female, gay, disabled — you can go beyond all obstacles and become successful in America.

Joey takes a lot of pride in knowing that he can make a difference in people’s futures. People leave his shows not only laughing, but also feeling good about themselves and their future.

Comedy Hosting
info@comedyhosting.com
1-888-428-4646

Joey Vega’s Twitter account